Blame it on the Alcohol

I once climbed a couple balconies to get to my girlfriends apartment because i forgot how to get back into into the building.

 

I dont drink either. I've seen some silly sh*t from drinkers like my Grandpa and great Uncle fighting over a railroad whistle though.
I try to avoid it myself. It doesn't go too well with my gene pool.

 

That's why we're here. We're not fun enough to be elsewhere drinking. Halp. *goes back to watching Arlo play Slender after asking for help with being a shut in* *there is no hope* *my soul is forever a hermit*

 

Oh man, Drunk stories. National pastime in Ireland really.

I've a few but I'll share one. I remember I was out with a friend and we had gone to the pub quite early, ( I was in the UK at the time and they close early, around 10 or 11 I think). Anyway, got there and started drinking, I was having Spiced Rum and Coke, double naturally and my friend was on cider. Few hours went by and I remember going up to the bar and ordering another round, they informed me that unfortunately the spiced rum was out as I'd finished it. Moved on to normal rum. Coming up to closing time so the bar calls last orders, friend comes back and says that the bar maid is quite impressed I can still stand, finish up our drinks and we were walking home. It wasn't a long walk but I remember it was dark out. We came to a turn in the road and we had just been chatting, I remember my friend saying its the police and the car just sat there. My friend keeps telling me we should cross and I refuse point blank stating "No. There is a car there. And if we cross it will run us over and we will die". When I woke up the next day I vaguely remember my friend trying to reason with me saying that its the police and they are waiting for us to cross. I still refused to cross however. I'm not sure how long this went on for but my friend says it was maybe ten or fifteen minutes. Eventually I looked at the car and realised it wasn't moving, turned to my friend and said, "Ok, I think its safe to cross, the car doesn't seem to be moving." Once we crossed the police drove off, I'm fairly certain that they were insuring I was able to move.

That isn't were the fun ends though, we arrived home and my friend was insistent that I went straight to bed, and we argued a little while, no voices raised or anything, just me saying I didn't want to go to bed and her telling me it would be a good idea. Anyway she convinced me and we starting walking up the stairs. I remember hearing a loud thud, and I turned around to ask my friend if she was OK. She said something in reply but I didn't hear it and I remember thinking, ' Christ, she is so drunk she's after falling up the stairs.'

Woke up the next morning any my shins were killing me. Thought back on it and realised I'd fallen and then asked if my friend was OK. Still haven't quite lived it down.

It's a bit long winded but its one of my personal favourites. I have others if anyone would like to hear them.

 

I want more stories Kairu!

I have not done too many embarrassing things while drinking, but here are some stories.

Story 1. So, in the big city where I go to University, there is a public garden that they close usually around 10 pm. One day, my friends and I were drinking at my apartment (while singing Disney Karaoke because it is a staple of our nights) we decided it would be a good idea to visit the gardens. We got there to see that they were closed and the fence is quite tall (I would say 10 ft, but we are all 5 ft-ish so it is quite the distance). I had the brilliant idea that my friends could hike me over the fence and then I would help them cross over too.

Well, I stood on their hands and they threw me as hard is they could over it and I basically hit the top, ripped my pants, and crumpled on the other side (I managed to get over!). It was quite humiliating, but my friends thought it was funny. I brought them all over from there and we chilled inside for a bit, before realizing one of the other fences surrounding the park was only 7 ft tall and much easier to scale...

The pants died for no good reason.

Story 2. After downing a whole bottle of wine while watching Howl's Moving Castle, I decided I wanted to get McDonald's during a raging snowstorm. So, as I was leaving, one of my male friends saw me and decided he would accompany me on this quest. It was a solid adventure, I basically played around in snowbanks as we went, but then I ran into this massive snowbank that must have been at least 15 ft.

My male friend, a voice of reason, was trying to convince me that climbing that snowbank in my state would not be a good idea. Bah humbug to that thought. I climbed it as valiantly as any prince in history, and made it to the top. From there, I did a quick turn to show my friend that I made it and do a warrior pose, lost my footing, and tumbled down the other side of the bank. As gracefully as possible, of course.

Good thing snow is not hard; he watched me and thought I must have broken something. Fortunately all was well and I got my chicken nuggets in the end.

------

And there we go.

 

It really all depends on what mood I get into when drinking.

One time a friend and I put down 2 4 packs of Seagrams (which was disgusting afterwards) a fifth of Smirnoff and some Katchatka or however you spell it. We were just done for at this point. Apparently I went live on Facebook and I got her puking everyone. Like on her phone everything and I'm just laughing and asking her if she was puking. Like I felt bad the next day and deleted it because that probably was really embarrassing for her. I did have my own embarrassment and was whining over how my exes hurt me and all this personal crap. Thank god it was around 4 in the morning and a high of like 5 people saw it.

Another time recently, I had just gotten into beer. So I had a few cans and some mixed drinks at a party, and in this persons basement were poles. I can't remember what for but every basement has them. And I decided it would be a great idea to just start swinging on it. Yeah, definitely not how I want to portray myself haha.

I'm also not a smoker at all, but I've done way more hilarious things while being high than drunk. If there's even a thread for that.