I am afraid not...

No idea.

I've got one Why did the one eyed chicken cross the road?

 

i forgot what my joke was and i dont really care...but........to get his other eye back?

 

No to go to the birdseye shop.
I was taught that one when I was 4

 

cute, as in its sorta funny, but not super lol

 

this jokes pretty good....

The inmate on death row was scheduled to be put to death by firing squad the following morning. Throughout the day, the prison guards were being very nice to him. But when they asked him if he wanted something specific for his last meal, he said he didn't want anything special. When they asked if there was something special he wanted to do, he said nothing. It went on like this all day.

Finally, when he was put before the firing squad, the guard asked if he wanted a cigarette and a blindfold.

"No," the inmate said, "just get it over with."

"Well, is there anything that I can do for you before you go?" said the guard. "You didn't even want a special last meal!"

The inmate thought. "Actually," he said, "Music is my life. One thing I would really like would be to sing my favorite song, one whole time through, with no interruptions."

The guard nodded and told him to go ahead.

The inmate started, "One billion bottles of beer on the wall..."

 

LOL! Never heard that one before!
Anyway this is quite long winded so u might find it boring.
A blond goes into a barbers to have her hair cut.(duh!)
She has an ipod with the earphones in her ears. The barber tells her to sit down. She asks "In what?"
"Well the chair of course!"
She sits down and the barber asks her to take her earphones out. She says "I need them to live"
Sighing the barber begins to cut her 4ft long hair. With great difficulty around the earphones. After 5 minutes the blond falls asleep (as they do) in his chair. Carefully he removes the earphones and cuts away for about 80 seconds. Suddenly the girl drops dead. He is shocked. Bending down, he picks up the earphones and puts them to his ears. What were they saying?
"Breathe in. Breathe out. Breathe in. Breathe out.."
I always found that funny for some reason!

 

↑↑ both of those are funny ↑↑

 

Lol, good.

 

to get away from your corny jokes no offense

 

why did the gum cross the road?

 

(Um. THis is more like bumping a thread SRM so please don't post in a thread that is super old like last year please.)

 

hows this one.
There was once this wide mouthed frog, and he hopped out into the world
first he came across a bird, and he says "HI, I'M A WIDE MOUTHED FROG AND I LIKE TO EAT BUGS!", the bird replies, "Hello I'm a bird and I eat worms." the frog then says "OK, BYE!" and he hops along.
Next he came across a turtle, and he says "HI, I'M A WIDE MOUTHED FROG AND I LIKE TO EAT BUGS!", the turtle replies, "Hello I'm a turtle and I eat grass." the frog then says "OK, BYE!" and he hops along.
Next he came across a mouse, and he says "HI, I'M A WIDE MOUTHED FROG AND I LIKE TO EAT BUGS!", the mouse replies, "Hello I'm a mouse and I eat grain." the frog then says "OK, BYE!" and he hops along.
Finally the frog comes across a snake and he says "HI..." but the snake interrupts him with "Hello, I'm a snake, and I eat wide mouthed frogs..." the frog replies "Too bad you don't see any of those around"